I often start my day with good intentions. I make lists. However, I allow myself to get distracted by other things such as cleaning or cooking. Though these are good things in and of themselves as they also benefit others in my household, I use these as an excuse not to do those things God may be calling me to do. I also distract myself by scrolling the news feeds or checking social media. After all, I need to know what’s going on in the world and with my loved ones, I tell myself. True, this is also important but again, I use it as an excuse not to do what God may be calling me to do.
Why the excuses? Why the distractions? The answer for me is fear of failure, fear of going outside of my comfort zone, fear of rejection, and fear of imperfection. These fears are the storm rocking my boat leading me to cry out to Christ, who seems to be sleeping. “Please help me, can’t you see I’m about to drown?” I am reminded of His response to the apostles, “Oh you of little faith,” before he calms the storm for them anyway.
Reflecting back on this story from Mathew 8: 23-27, I imagine myself in this situation. I imagine myself looking to Jesus, sound asleep in the corner of the boat. Instead of panicking, I imagine myself quietly approaching him, laying down next to him and placing my head against him. I imagine myself dozing next to him as he wraps his protective, welcoming, and loving arm around me. After a short time, I imagine the storm calming as He sits up and takes my hand. He smiles at me and whispers, “Come now, we have work to do.” He stands up and gently pulls me up with him. Filled with love and awe, I can’t help but smile and tell him, “I will go with you. I will work with you.” There’s no more hesitancy, no more fear.
I kept this in my mind all day today and found myself at peace and my fears calmed as I went about doing the work he asked of me. The temptation to distract myself was gone. It’s challenging to trust so completely. I can’t help but question whether I will be able to do this in every situation. However, by remembering this story and my imagined place in it I may be on the right path. Remember to rest in him, unite with him, walk with him and work with him.
Sylvia M. Olberding 